By D of DnW
First of all, let me apologize if I ramble. I’m not a writer, even in the amateur sense of the word. But I do enjoy talking, so it can’t be that different. W and I have the greatest marriage/relationship of any couple I know. We can literally count on one hand the number of times in the last 28 years that we’ve even argued, let alone had a fight. We’re deeply in love, that couple that always holds hands and kisses when one of us leaves the room. And the sex is incredible! Like a fine wine, it seems to get better and better with age. It was strictly by accident (or maybe fate) that we ended up in the Lifestyle.
About two years ago we went to Toronto for the weekend. I had found this great deal on a nice hotel downtown: you just had to go to a "First Taste" tour at the sex club next door to qualify. We though "What the hell? We’ll go do the tour, then go do something else." We arrived at the club at the appointed time, W all dolled up in a little mini skirt and bustier. There was us, three other couples, and a single lady there for the tour, ranging in age from mid-twenties to late-forties. The tour lasted approximately an hour, and was honestly fascinating. We had absolutely no idea what went on in an on-premises club.
The club we went to has a heated (102F) outdoor pool (we went in the coldest January on record here in Canada!), a big hot tub, two bars, a dungeon and multiple play rooms. We went on a Thursday, which was fairly slow. Our initial shock at seeing naked people walk up to the bar was nothing compared to seeing two couples going at it in the first play room we walked by. Rather than being appalled, we were turned on like crazy! As soon as the tour was over we couldn’t get our clothes off fast enough. We fucked like horny college kids, and it was amazing. We ended up going out to the pool, the hot tub, the bar and ended the night in the room with one way mirrors where the people in the bar can watch you. We almost closed the place!
Afterwards as we walked back to the hotel, we giggled to each other that we couldn’t believe we had just done that. Surprisingly to both of us, we had even hotter sex for weeks after that experience.
That evening started us on the journey that has seen us slowly dipping our toes in the Lifestyle Pool for the last two years. Suddenly our bedroom talk went from just “dirty talk”, to discussions about seeing us each with someone else, group sex, etc. Within a couple months we joined a LS website (Quiver I’m happy to say), and that opened another door for us. We had discovered we REALLY enjoyed exhibitionism at the club and Quiver allowed us to indulge that from the comfort (and privacy) of our own home. We started posting to the main page, and found a completely non-judgmental and supportive community. We suddenly had friends all over North America and beyond! A side effect of all those picture posts was people wanted to talk to us and meet us. Geography dictates that there still aren’t a lot of Quiverites local to us in Ontario, so for the most part our relationships were in the cyber realm. This was a great way for us to ease into things and feel our way around.
Not surprisingly, W attracted a lot of attention, and a lot of the messages we received were really geared to her. We weeded through that to find some couples that we felt a connection to and started to chat. I still remember the mixed feelings I felt the first time I read W’s texts (we share all our communications with each other) with a fellow from Texas whom we were friends with as a couple. While my texts with his Mrs had been more general and mundane, W’s had been leaning towards the explicit. That left me feeling almost queezy! W and I were married very young, and we both had only a couple sex partners before that and none others in the 26 years since. I was thinking, “If dirty texting makes me jealous, how will I ever handle actually seeing W with someone else?"
It took a bit of soul searching on my part, but I knew that W loves me and nothing could change that. We talked, and I told her my feelings and it made me realize I had absolutely nothing to worry about. Still, 26 years of playing the Tarzan protecting my Jane from all challengers was a difficult thing to get over. But get over it I did.
Fast forward a year and a half, and we are in the present. The last two weeks to be precise. W and I have met several couples for dinner, but up until the last two weeks we have never managed to get together for a second "date". Not that we all didn’t want to, everyone just lives such busy lives and the logistics just haven't worked out.
A few weeks ago a couple messaged back and forth with us that was relatively local, and we all seemed to have a lot in common. A very last minute plan was made to meet for dinner on Friday night. We actually met this couple on a local website, but I’m happy to say we converted them and they are now on Quiver as well (we always try to play the ambassador for Quiver). Dinner went fantastic, it was like we had been friends forever. The evening flew by, and we were all actually sad to leave.
As soon as W and I were in the car, we were talking about what a great couple they were and how we just had to see them again. We were pretty sure they felt the same way, and they did! We weren’t even out of town yet and W received a text from the mrs saying what a great night they had, and that they really wanted to meet again and play. At this I had to pull the car over so W and I could talk. You have to realize, W and I still had never been with another couple. Our Lifestyle experiences lay solely in the realms of exhibitionism at the club. We talked quickly, and we were both in agreement that this was the couple we wanted to have our first experience with.
Fast forward to two nights ago. After a fantastic week of texting/sexting for all four of us, we were going to meet again for supper. There was a Meet & Mingle scheduled in the city this couple lives in, so we booked a hotel suite for the night and planned to go with them and if things went well they would come back to the hotel with us for some playtime. Now this is the part where I (the male) start getting nervous and anxious. How will I handle seeing W with someone else? How will she handle seeing me with someone else? What if I get really nervous and can’t get it up? What if Mrs. Other Couple doesn’t enjoy it? What if the bed isn’t comfy? Everything was running through my mind!
As it was, I didn’t need to worry. They came up to our room before the M & M and we had a few drinks, the conversation flowed freely and all was right with the world. As we were all sitting around, the flirting started and W put her hand on Mr. Other Couple’s leg. To my surprise, there were no jealous feelings on my part. In fact, I found I was happy to see W happy, and if anything was getting aroused by the whole scene (Mrs. Other Couple rubbing my leg with her foot probably didn’t hurt either).
Happily W smiled at me when she saw this, and any reservations I had melted away. We all drove to the M & M together, but honestly we didn’t mingle. We spent the whole evening talking, laughing and flirting, just the four of us. Afterwards we headed back to our suite and again sat for a drink talking. This was the part where I felt awkward. How do we actually start this? Thankfully Mrs. Other Couple handled this nicely by standing up and saying "Let’s go to the bedroom", so we all did. Once the ice was broken things progressed quickly, we were all naked and on the bed in record time. The four of us all on the King sized bed, me with Mrs. Other Couple and W with the Mr. It was pretty frantic, we were all making out like crazy.
I looked over as W moaned as the first tongue other than mine in 28 years licked her pussy, and she smiled at me and I at her while moaning myself from the fantastic oral attention I was receiving). I felt a warmness inside that I really can’t describe. We were sharing something that I know our vanilla friends will never understand: we were both feeling compersion. And it honestly made the whole experience that much better.
After our friends left (at almost 3am), W and I had sex again. I’d like to say we made love, but it actually was pretty animalistic! We couldn’t get enough of each other. We slept for a few hours, got up and did it again. Later on the way home we "debriefed" in the car, just to make sure we were both reading the signals right from each other. We found that we did indeed both feel the same way, and that mutual feeling (as incredible as it sounds) has actually brought us even closer together and more in love.
I can honestly say I was incredibly skeptical when I first read about compersion on the Quiver feed. I couldn’t understand how sharing your wife with another man could bring you closer together, but I misunderstood. It’s not sharing your wife: you’re sharing an experience with your wife; the same as she’s sharing it with you. I believe what I’ve read that the Lifestyle can be destructive to a relationship that isn’t sound or to one that's already in trouble, and that's right. Swinging won’t fix it.
But for a relationship that is sound and a couple truly in love, the shared experience is amazing. I can tell you from experience that compersion IS real!